A Very Merry (low-key) Birthday

As I mentioned last year, I have had a difficult time with my birthday over the last few years. I know -- it's better to have one than not, the people who love you like having the chance to celebrate you, I'm not over-the-hill yet... but it's still uncomfortable for me to celebrate, especially given the disappointing year I've had, personally.

But, with an incredible family I felt loved. My mom and dad made plans to take us to the Padres game that night but I was surprised that my brother, sister and their "significant others" came as well. We sat in the Park in the Park beforehand to eat sammiches. We got the awesome give-away 1984 jerseys. Also, my mom and sister made the cutest little snack packs (and Sophia got me a birthday button).

The Padres honored first responders who saved lives and homes during the fire storm the week before, which was really moving. They played 80s music the whole game -- The Dancing Groundskeeper made and appearance (with backup dancers, which is now my new career goal). We lost. But it was fun.

And the next day we got to enjoy a delicious Memorial Day bbq with the whole family, who despite carefully declaring that it was simply a bbq in which we happened to have a birthday cake, still made me feel special. How can you not when you take home these incredible flowers?

Finally, because I'm considering it a late birthday gift; I have to share my giddiness at getting a personal tweet from Michael Kelly, who plays Doug Stamper on House of Cards. #gahhh I mean, my HOC withdrawal sparked a total fixation on this guy (mostly his voice, I could listen to him read the phone book; but how gorgeous is his smile--which we never see on the show). Anyways, he seems like a totally nice guy and I appreciate his support of gun regulations and I appreciate that he took the time to respond. Sure it's a little thing but apparently we both totally made each other smile. And now we're getting married. #DougStamperLives

So the birthday is over for another year and it didn't make me feel any better about being 31 and in the midst of a total career stagnation and not having babies or a house or a dog; but it did make me feel loved. And isn't that what's really the most important?

Making a wish for everyone to be surrounded by love on their birthday and always,

Employment Update (3)

It's been awhile since I updated anyone who cares to know about my dismal job prospects.

I'd had some great interviews with really world-class organizations. At least the feedback I got was that they were great... but there was someone just a little bit more perfect than me. I'd also applied for at least 6.4 million  trillion jobs for which I was perfect on paper and never even got a response ("Thanks but no thanks," "Go away," "Kiss our collective ass," nothing). 

And as family and friends kept reassuring me, this happens to a majority of people out there. Especially when you're competing among thousands of people and hundreds of applicants for ONE position. And even more especially when the company or organization is probably legally or otherwise obligated to open the position to anyone even though they've already decided to promote from within or promised it to their ex-mother-in-law's nephew's girlfriend or something. In the end there is only so much you can control and the rest is out of your hands... It. Is. The. Actual. Worst. And I always believed that good things would come to good people who worked hard. 

This gets you a more polite rejection. Sometimes.

And it finally made me realize that I don't think I want to do that anymore. In my career thus far I have never stayed more than about three years in one job, and even that was at my most recent one. I don't want to continue looking for new jobs every couple of years and I would be really pushing my luck by doing that the older I get. Plus, every time I've started somewhere new I've had to start at the bottom again. I've never had a significant raise, promotion or bonus, even though I've always been asked to take on more responsibilities and did so well. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong, because I see other people who I went to school with, pursuing the same type of work and apparently loving and excelling at it. I imagine that it's some combination of 

• lack of self-confidence (I settle instead of going after what I really want and know I could be capable of)
• bad luck and timing (who gets laid off the day after their wedding, COME ON) 
• loyalty (I've stayed in positions out of some feeling of obligation when my instincts told me it was time to start looking for something better)
• lack of a killer instinct (I'm in no way my own best advocate--from what I've read this is a bit of a female problem-- and always act just grateful that I'm allowed to come to work instead of acting like I know I'm an asset to the company)
• being a girl (let's be real here)
• not being willing to move or take an obscene commute (can't / won't)
• just not being good enough (this one kills me because I feel like I should have complete control over this)

So basically it sucks. And even though I love what I've done (for the most part) in PR and marketing and fundraising and event planning and think--if I could just get a real opportunity--that I could be bangin,' I finally decided I am having a mid-life crisis and want to get away from all that and do what I planned to and should have done in junior high and high school -- I want to go back to school and train to be a certified occupational therapy assistant. Total change but it has the potential to let me fulfill what I really want in a job--the chance to help people, to be creative and challenged, and to have security to raise a family. 

So I have to re-take anatomy as a pre-req before I can apply to the program, wait out however long the waiting list is, and then bust my ass for about two years to complete it. So it will be an awkward and potentially difficult few transitional years. But the long-term prospects for this field are so much better in terms of  job growth, opportunities, salary, and flexibility (I originally became interested in OT by visiting nursing homes with my grandmother, who worked for some time as a sales rep for orthopedic splints to help patients with things like hand contractures due to arthritis or a stroke; but I've also observed the OT for the school district working with the autistic children my mom works with, and would love to help special needs kids adapt to their classroom and succeed). What's also funny is that my sister, who graduates from UCSD in a few weeks, is thinking of pursuing the same field (or PT)...So maybe we can take some classes together :)

I'm a little encouraged because I was at an OT conference last year (again, tagging along with my Nana who was hosting a booth for the company she works for) and met some students in the program I'd like to apply to; and they said that actually most students in the program are people in their 20s and 30s who have some experience who are trying to change or further their careers, not necessarily 18yr olds who are making good life decisions early. So even though I feel overwhelmed by the prospect of being a student again (I think I forgot how to do that) and being too old to go back to school and feeling like it's already too late to change direction in life, I'm trying to trust the voice inside me and those from people I love around me who are saying that I can do this and that it will be ok.

In a perfect world I would be able to go back to school part-time while we have little infants and toddlers in the house, then maybe find a perfect 25-30 hr/week job or something flexible when our kids get into school. That's the best case scenario and obviously considering how my work life has gone so far I don't expect that. #jaded

Also, I've decided that in order to be able to concentrate on school, when I get to that point, that I'd like to find a job that leaves work at work, and doesn't require longer hours or deadlines or things of that nature. So I've applied to some temp-to-hire type agencies that place people in a lot of admin-type positions. Admin work (filing, answering phones, etc.) has always been my least-favorite part of any job I've had but I know I CAN do it if I have to and I think it will fit my needs. However, after a completely unsatisfactory experience so far, I'm starting to evaluate whether we could be realllllllly disciplined and frugal and survive if I just stayed home for a few years with some babies--after all, most jobs I'm applying to right now would pay me about $2 an hour once we paid for daycare, taxes, gas to go to work, etc.... and I don't want our babies in full-time daycare, it's just not for us. SOOOOO... that is what's occupying my brain pretty much every moment that we're not watching Game of Thrones or Mad Men.

Trying to keep the faith that this is how life works.

Anyone else having their mid-life crisis or regretting their career choices? Anyone trying to make a huge change and having trouble with that first step? Anyone want to give me a pile a of money so I can afford to stay home with my precious not-yet-conceived children for a few years? Anyone feel like I'm making another terrible life decision? Anyone have a better idea (my other idea is to move to like, Finland or Denmark or Sweden)?

Please wish me luck because I'm going to need it, 

Project Post: Easy Canvas Applique Art

Here's a quick and easy one.

So awhile back I needed three small canvases for a project I was doing for a baby shower. For something that seems like such a simple object, canvases can be pricey! So when I found a Bargain Pack of 10 at JoAnn's and I had a 50% off coupon, I figured I'd find something to do with the other 7. I think including this project I still have 3 to go.

Anyways, you could adapt this a million different ways, but in my case I had been hoarding two applique numbers. Backstory: the Padres hold a "Garage Sale" for charity before the start of every season. They pull tons of stuff from out of storage and you never know what you'll find --- game-used jerseys, autographed balls, surplus promotional items, old banners used on the streetlamps surrounding the ballpark, batting helmets, uniform pants... it's crazy. Season ticket holders get priority entrance and line up around the block at like 7am hoping to get their hands on cool memorabilia. But if you volunteer at the Garage Sale (and get the coveted set-up shift), you can claim first dibs.

Last year I found a box of assorted letters and numbers, the kind that are sewn onto the backs of jerseys. I was hoping to find numbers to spell out our full anniversary (12.27.08), but only wanted the retro brown numbers, so I could only find "27." Good enough. As it turned out, the 27 fit on my canvas perfectly.

I had some khaki twill-ish fabric on hand from a previous project, so after ironing it I laid my canvas in the center and cut out a square with a couple of extra inches on each side. From there I basically followed the guidelines of how the canvas was already wrapped, and like wrapping a present, I worked on one side at a time and stapled the edges and corners.

You'll need to work on the corners so that they stay snug and relatively flat. Also, I decided to tuck in the little bit of excess I had on a couple of the sides and add a few extra staples.

Once I had my canvas ready, I considered using my glue gun to adhere the numbers, but since I had this no-sew fabric glue on hand I thought I'd give that a try and hope for fewer glue-strings. The directions basically just tell you to add the glue to both pieces of fabric that you're sticking together -- but since I was sure I would get glue on parts of the canvas I didn't want to get glue on, I stuck to putting glue on the perimeter of my numbers, carefully laying them on my canvas, and then before they had time to bond I carefully lifted the edges of the numbers and added a thin line of glue to the canvas as well. 

I did one number at a time, and while it dried/bonded I laid a heavy book on top. Oh, I also recommend using something flat that fits within the frame of the canvas to give you a better working surface -- I used my 9-inch square cake pan. Then when you lay the book on top it's really pressing the two fabrics together firmly from both sides. Repeat with second number (or letter or applique shape or whatever you're using).

Overall, even though I can see that I don't have the spacing quite right, I'm pretty happy with how this turned out! In fact when E saw it laying on the table after I'd finished it he said he thought I had a Padres jersey folded up just showing the numbers. That's fun, right? If you don't have access to MLB-surplus items, you can usually find jersey numbers and/or letters at sporting goods stores, embroidery shops or sometimes screenprinters, even craft stores and trophy shops. Doing a name, jersey-style, or a birthday could be really cute for a kid's room. It's an easy way yo make something one-of-a-kind and totally personal.

So this is eventually going to be part of a gallery wall in our bedroom -- we've lived here more than four years and I've never really put any art on our bedroom walls. It's sad. But not for much longer! #AnotherUnfinishedProject In the meantime I had fun staging it with some other Padres stuff (and retro Padres-colored flowers).

So what kind of quick and easy art projects are you doing lately? Anything using these cute little 10-inch canvases? I think I bought a pack of 10 for about $20, and my garage sale numbers were like, $1 each so that makes this a pretty frugal art piece. :)

Happy canvassing,

Pinspired: Bunny Bark

I'd been eyeing those "Bunny Bark" or "Bunny Bait" recipes... stuff like this. Pretty straightforward, if you've melted white and dark chocolate to make Peppermint Bark, you can surely do this.

The recipe I more-or-less used can be found here, from Your Homebased Mom. I'm sure that her finished product, if I followed it to the letter, is fantastic--I mean it looks good enough to eat right off my screen--but I just don't often follow recipes to the letter!

I kind of took note of the ingredients then winged it based on what caught my eye at the store. I know most of the recipes use those Golden Oreos to keep everything nice and pastel-colored, but... Double Stuf Oreos are better, #AmIRight?  I also grabbed a couple of small boxes of chocolate-dipped peanuts, but I think almonds would be amazing, and I just used several snack-sized bags of pretzels since that happened to be a better deal than one larger bag. If you can't find the white Almond Bark you could use those candy melts from Michael's or JoAnn's. I pulled out the food coloring but didn't think I needed it... Really you could make this completely loaded with candy and sweets or keep it simple, it's entirely up to you!

To try to keep things on the cleaner side I lined my cookie sheet in aluminum foil first, and you might want to give it a spritz of non-stick spray just to make your life easier.

I started by breaking up and laying down my pretzel pieces and Oreo chunks, as well as the chocolate-dipped peanuts. This helped keep the color of the finished bark more pastel-ish instead of being really muddled by Oreo dust. I reserved a handful of each to add to the top of the finished bark.

Just be careful to melt your chocolate in small increments (time-wise, like just 15 seconds or so at a time once it starts to get soft) to avoid burning it!

Using smaller increments again, I spread it over my cookie-pretzel layer on my baking sheet, followed by a sprinkling of pastel M&Ms and crystal-y sprinkles while the chocolate was still nice and soft. I just did one manageable section at a time.

After working my way across the baking sheet with a layer of white chocolate, I used my reserved pretzel-peanut-Oreos and smushed them into the still-soft chocolate so that the top gave a hint of what was covered by chocolate at the bottom. Then it's just a matter of staying away from it long enough to let it harden!

Then break that ish up. I've made Peppermint Bark that basically shatters when you look at it because the layers come out so delicate, but this bark has a bit more bite, I guess you could say, and I had to pretty much slice it into squares in some cases where the chocolate-cookie-pretzel goodness was really thick.

I think the best thing, other than it's packed with so many yummy and not-good-for you things, is the sweet-and-salty mix you get by adding the pretzels. I will caution that it came out super-rich...definitely plan on giving most of this away or bringing it to a party because your tummy will not appreciate you binging on this!

Again, this is super-easy, doesn't take much time, and could easily be a fun project for kiddos to participate in with you. Throw a few pieces into a cute bag or basket with a bow and it's perfect for neighbors, teachers or friends. 

Enjoy!!! 

April Powers

Baseball is back. Grass is green. Papa's birthday is this week and my Dad's is later this month. I start a new job and hopefully bright things are ahead. Feeling positive and grateful for people and opportunities. 

I think ole' Bill Shakespeare said it best --- 

Xoxox, 

Project Post: A Springtime Peacetime Wreath

Happy Spring! I guess it's officially spring but we've had such remarkably nice weather (even for here) all winter that I'm already feeling summery. Except that I still have pretty pasty legs.

So I had been wanting to make a peace sign wreath. I wanted it to be rustic and flowery and... peaceful.

There are a million ways you could make one, I'm sure. But here's what I did (and this is, I promise you, something any crafter or non-crafter could do):

Start with a cardboard base. I used the shoe box my husband's work boots came in (a pizza box would probably work well). Traced a circle, cut it out, wrapped tape around it to help stabilize it, painted it a few shades of green. Pretty elementary school-level crafting so far.

Then I added moss, which is probably the messiest part. Be prepared for that. For this project I used moss that comes on a roll held together with really thin wire (something like this); it comes pretty packed together so I had to stretch and arrange it a bit to "fluff" it. It was my biggest expense for this project and I think it was under $4, regular price. You could use a pack of loose moss as well but you'll probably need a lot more glue and time since basically every piece will need to be glued to your base as opposed to this moss ribbon which can be held on with a chunk of glue spaced around the wreath, does that make sense?

Next add layers of tree bark, I just broke mine off in small pieces. I also flipped the wreath over and added bark from the back of my base so that from the front it had a more three-dimensional look.

Not very pretty from the back, but who's looking?

I started layering on a ton of small and medium sticks I'd collected. Start with the big ones around the perimeter and to make the "structure" if you will, and then keep filling in with smaller ones. My trusty mini-glue gun was more than adequate for this. So far, still easy-peasy.

Almost done ---  I wrapped some jute twine around the whole thing to help keep everything in order, though really it's all that glue-gunning doing the work. I added the twine to the back to hang it from a hook or nail, too. Ok, and literally I almost forgot to tell you to add branches to the center to make it a peace sign. duh. This is pretty straightforward, the most difficult part was finding three sticks that created the shape I wanted and fit together, so just keep trying until it looks right. You might want to reserve a few of your longer, thicker, branch-ier sticks for this part so that you have more to work with, and you can always break them up to be shorter. Even though they're primarily held together by glue, I added more twine where they meet to keep that handmade look.  

You can see better here that the whole thing has a really layered, rustic look. It's imperfect.
I wanted it to have the feeling of something Maid Marian would have just
thrown together on a springtime afternoon in Sherwood Forest, #HowsThatForAVisual? 

Finally, add the finer details. I pulled individual buds and sprigs off of a few large stems from Dollar Tree and JoAnn's, just filling them in by working my way around the wreath. This may be the hardest step and it is still easy.

And that's it!

I have had this on our front door for about two months now and it has held up perfectly well. Granted we've had just one spring storm during that time, but you know, it experienced wind and rain. :) This was also a really inexpensive project; when you consider I used recycled cardboard, found sticks and bark, and already had the twine, glue gun and glue sticks on hand. If you needed to purchase supplies, I'd suggest searching for a Michael's or JoAnn's coupon to save a bit on the glue gun (the mini-size is usually under $5, I think), and I usually find glue sticks at the 99-cent or dollar store. I happened to find my flowers there as well although again, Michael's usually has a huge selection that go on sale, and you don't need many. I'm confident that you could make this wreath for under $15 or so.

So there's my Springtime Peacetime Wreath! What are you crafting to welcome Spring and/or get ready for Summer? Anyone working on some kind of wreath, or maybe fun Easter crafts? I feel like this is something you could use through the Easter season without it having eggs and bunnies on it --- I mean wasn't Jesus' mission to bring salvation and peace? :) Is everyone ready for Spring weather? I'm loving the 80-degrees days we've had off-and-on, can't lie :)

Happy Spring and Peace Be With You,

Easy Riders.

So E and I had been talking a lot about how nice it would be to take up bike riding. Not in a Lance Armstrong-way, just something that would be great to do on all the beautiful-weather days we have around here.

We figured the pros were:

1. It's healthy.
2. Once you get past the initial cost, it's relatively cheap (we have tons of bike paths near the beach and a really nice one at the lake literally  next door to our house).
3. It would be nice to start something as a couple that we can continue to enjoy later on as a family (I'm already picturing how cute he would be with a baby seat on the back or towing one of those kids' trailers).

There's probably others.

Anyways, since I had a few-years old beach cruiser still at my mom and dad's house (they upgraded my basket as a surprise and my brother so nicely gave it a tune-up-----THANK YOU!!!), I had decided I wanted to get him one for his birthday. After making sure we could afford it, I dropped a million hints when we saw cool bikes like "Hey, look at that cool one with the blue wheels." Honestly for as smart as he is he just does not pick up on little things like that, otherwise I'd have been worried he knew what was coming. :)

So I had a pretty good idea of what he'd want -- sleek and sporty -- and what we could manage, cost and maintenance-wise. As much as I try not to shop at WalMart because, stick it to the man, I ended up there looking at exactly what I had in mind. It was slightly on sale at the time so it was right in the range of what I wanted to spend and it had overall great reviews dating back a couple years (I read them all). From what I read from previous customers, it wasn't going to win you the Tour de France or do a good job of going up and down mountains, but was good for rides around the neighborhood or boardwalk -- perfect. They also said it was easy to assemble and to customize with various parts, if you so desired. And so with E still working during the week in LA for another couple weeks so I knew I could make it a surprise, I hit "order" and eagerly awaited the free warehouse-to-store pickup delivery.

When I went to pick it up, oh man. The box barely fit in the shopping cart. And because I was driving the old Corolla, I wasn't sure I'd get it home, either. But love conquers all and I wedged it into the backseat. :)

Also, I carried it down the block into our living room. It wasn't that it was excessively heavy, just that I couldn't get my arms all the way around it (for reference, see below). Should've planned better but that's how I live.

It came partially assembled, thank goodness, and I'm proud to say that I put the rest of it together myself. #IDidIt  Most of my assembly experience comes from Ikea furniture so this was a lesson in following directions written in actual words and not with little stick figure suggestions. Oh yeah, I dropped it on myself at one point and my entire leg was bruised but since I have a tendency to walk into furniture, doorways, etc. he didn't think this was weird, either.

before...

after!!!

Then I had to hide it. Even though E was gone during the week he was still home Friday night - Sunday afternoon and it was two weeks before his birthday. Amazingly, I got it into our closet. We have one of those shallow closets with sliding doors that runs the length of the wall and it is STUFFED because it's basically the only closet we have (#FirstWorldProblems), so I had to move the rolls of wrapping paper and our suitcase... and again, my darling thought nothing of the extra clutter in our room (and never opened that side of the closet since it mostly contains lesser-used things like winter coats, dressy clothes, and the aforementioned wrapping paper and suitcase.

The morning of his birthday he ran to the store for milk (thanks, babe!) and I quickly wrangled the bike back out so that it was right in front of the door when he walked back in. And he was surprised! It was so fun. I got a "WTF" out of him. He had nooooo idea that a bike had been hiding behind his khakis and a shoe rack.

How cute is he?
Also is that a shadow or giant stain on the side of the couch? :|

And so we ride! We've been to Mission Bay a few times now (the aforementioned miles of nice bike paths) and I've been riding around the lake quite a bit. And with summer coming I look forward to really taking advantage of being able to explore the beaches, neighborhoods, and other trails. The thing we're still trying to figure out is where to store them---I'd like to keep them covered on our patio but I've also looked at those cool wall-mounted racks. Any suggestions for keeping two bikes in a small-ish apartment?

What about you? Any avid cyclists or just weekend warriors? Anyone making a bike purchase any time soon? I can say that E really likes his, we did change out the seat to a wider, cruiser-style one because the original was waaay to narrow to be comfortable for anyone who has a butt, of any kind.

Happy Trails!